


Steady and Safe

by RDJWINCHESTER1



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bucky Barnes Has Nightmares, Bucky Barnes Has PTSD, Disney+ (tv), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Falcon And The Winter Soldier - Freeform, M/M, Nightmares, Protective Sam Wilson, Soft Sam Wilson, scared Bucky
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-09
Updated: 2019-12-11
Packaged: 2021-01-25 22:28:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21363685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RDJWINCHESTER1/pseuds/RDJWINCHESTER1
Summary: Bucky wakes from a nightmare and Sam waits for him to come back to him.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Sam Wilson
Comments: 2
Kudos: 117





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I am SOOOOO ready for Disney+!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #screaming #falconandthewintersoldier #samwilson #buckybarnes

“Тоска ржавая, Печь, Рассвет, Семнадцать, Добрые, девять, Возвращение, домой, Один, Грузовой вагон!”

_ “Rрузовой вагон!” _

_ “Rрузовой вагон… _

Bucky sat up drenched in a cold sweat, the Russian words still echoing in his head. ‘Longing, Rusted, Furnace, Daybreak, Seventeen, Benign, Nine, Homecoming, One, Freight Train, Freight Train, Freight Train…’

“James?”

A voice made Bucky move and grasp the knife under his pillow. 

“Bucky, it’s ok. You’re safe here with me at the cabin. You’re not with HYDRA. You’re with me.”

Bucky startled at the calm voice but remained still.  _ Sometimes the voices were nice...at first.  _

“I’m fine,” he spoke short and rough. No room for disbelief or argument for who stood before him in the dark bedroom. 

The soldier flinched has the shadow stepped closer and knelt beside the bed. 

“You were never a good liar,” the man spoke quietly. A joke hidden in a soft, steady and  _ safe _ tone. 

They sat for a couple moments in the dark before the man slowly but surely removed the knife from the stiff man on the bed. 

“It’s ok, you’re here with me. You’re safe,” the man never stopped with his steady and safe reassurances until Bucky started to believe him. 

Several more silent, but  _ safe _ moments passed till Bucky finally felt safe enough to move from the uncomfortable sitting position he was in and moved to a more comfortable position. He was still sitting but at ease. 

_ A soldier at ease.  _

“Do you want me to stay?”

“Yes,” Bucky murmured. 

“Ok, I’ll sit in the chair until you’re ready.” 

Steady but soft and  _ safe _ the man moved to the chair and side table that was next to the bed, turning on a soft lit lamp. 

Bucky blinked once to get accustomed to the light and watched as the man sat in the well worn chair and opened a book. Bucky didn’t take his eyes off the man as he read his book out loud in a steady and safe tone. 

“Harry Potter was a highly unusual boy in many ways. For one thing, he hated the summer holidays more than any other time of year. For another, he really wanted to do his homework but was forced to do it in secret, in the dead of night. And he also happened to be a wizard.”

After a couple of chapters Bucky laid down and after one more chapter he spoke. 

“Can we go to sleep now?”

The man put down the book. “Yeah. Can I join you?”

No one had given the soldier choices before. This man always let him choose and never got mad if he said no to anything. 

“Yes.”

The man was quiet as he put the book down and went over to the other side of the bed and climbed in next to Bucky. 

“Sam?”

Bucky turned to face the man.

Sam hummed and looked at him with tired eyes. Eyes that never wavered, that never faltered.  _ Steady. _ Brown eyes that meant safety ever time Bucky looked into them. 

“Why did you leave me?” 

“I’m sorry I left. I had to pee. I’m here now.” Soft and steady came the voice. A smile hidden in the voice. 

“You’re here?” He had to be sure.

Bucky closed his eyes and let himself drift as Sam’s steady and safe voice flowed over and around him. 

“I’m here. Always by your side... _ Always _ .”


	2. You're My Everything, If My Everything Was You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky's turn to be Sam's rock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because a couple of people asked for a second chapter.

Sam decided that he needed a cup of tea to calm his nerves. Most days were good and some days were bad. 

Today was a bad day. 

Sam hadn’t slept well last night for two reasons. The first, his soldier was gone. Second reason, he couldn’t stop thinking about Riley, his wing-man that he had lost in combat. 

Bucky had gotten a job at a nearby motorcycle refurbish shop. Bikers were not as judgement as most people. THey had done bad stuff in their life so they didn’t care what Bucky did in his life just as long as he could refurbish motorcycles. 

Bucky had gone to work early that morning and hadn’t known that Sam was feeling what he was feeling. 

And Sam was feeling lost, he kept hearing screaming and cries that weren’t there. 

“Fuck!”

Sam hadn’t been paying attention and had spilled the hot tea all over the table and himself. He stood up to clean the table but first shucked his pants. He was already dealing with first degree burns, he didn’t need any second degree ones. 

Sam wiped the table and himself down the went to wring out the washcloth. 

_ “Sam! Help Me! Run!” Gunshots ring in Sam’s ears as he whips around looking for Riley, looking for anyone, something, anything.  _

_ Nothing.  _

Sam can’t catch his breath. His legs fall out from under him and he falls to the kitchen floor. 

_ The gunshots get louder and never seem to stop. “Sam,” Riley screams. _

Sam slammed his hands over his ears. ‘Come on, this isn't real. Calm down. Riley is gone. Gone. Everyone is gone, even his own soldier.’ Sam tries to talk himself down but his breathing is coming too fast and not at all at the same time. 

Bucky slams the car into park, but jumps out before he has time to shut it off. He had been at work when Sam’s tracker went off. 

All the Avengers had trackers embedded in their wrist, right above the pulse. It didn’t hurt and wasn’t painful or bothersome. It was just precautionary that Tony and Steve had decided on ever since Steve had first found Bucky. Every Avengers, retired or not, had agreed and gotten one. 

Sam’s tracker had gone off due to any p heart rate and a drop in breathing rate. Bucky had access to Sam’s tracker info same as Steve had access to Tony’s. JARVIS had sent it to his phone and he had jumped in the car immediately. 

Bucky ran up and opened the door to find Sam on the kitchen floor near the sink. He had his hands clamped over his ears and was murmuring. “Gone. All gone. Not real.” over and over again. 

Bucky realized that Sam was having flashbacks and doubted that he realized that he had left the faucet on and water was running over the sink and on the floor. 

Bucky slowed down and took practiced steps towards the man. “Sam, it’s Bucky. Babe?”

Sam looked up and saw Bucky in front of him. _ At least this time it’s Bucky and not Riley.  _

Bucky looked at Sam and noticed his eyes were glossed over. He waded through the water and shut it off. After that, he sat down next to his husband and waited until Sam came back to him. 

It felt like Sam had just woken up. His eyes focused and he felt like he could see again and more importantly breath again. He took a deep breath and leaned his head against the cabinet. A soft voice made him turn his head. 

“Sam?”

Sam turned his head and looked in the most deep blue grayish eyes. And he’s never been happier to see those eyes. “Buck,” he choked on a sob. 

Bucky grabbed the man and enveloped him in a safe and strong hug. “Shh, shhh, it’s ok now. I promise.”

“He’s gone and I couldn’t save him. I couldn’t, I--”

“You tried and that’s all you can do sometimes. You saved me,” Bucky whispered in Sam’s ear as he let the man cry into his shoulder. 

Neither man knew how long they sat like that and neither man cared. 

After some time, Sam got off of Bucky’s chest but not his lap as he looked down at his lap. “Why am I wet?”

Bucky gave a small smile. “You forgot to shut off the water before you started crying like a girl.”

Sam rolled his eyes and made sure to put his elbow in Bucky’s groin as he got up. 

Bucky groaned then chuckled as Sam got to his feet. “You bitch,” he held his groin for a second. 

Sam snorted in amusement then frowned as he looked at the sink and floor. “I'm sorry, I didn’t--” Sam didn’t quite know what he was apologizing for but he just felt like…

...like a failure and Bucky knew how that felt so he didn’t say anything he just wrapped Sam in another hug. He tried to keep his voice steady as he spoke. “I love you and there is nothing wrong with you. You do everything you can for everyone else at the VA every day. You are strong and I love you so,  _ so _ much.” Near the end Bucky couldn’t keep his voice steady as he got choked up with emotion. 

Sam melted into the hug and ended it. He hit his husband in the chest lightly. “Hey, I’m the emotionally  _ girl _ in this relationship.”

Bucky didn’t say anything, he just leaned in and gave Sam a kiss. A kiss filled with love, passion and trust.

Sam took the kiss and he tried to show Bucky how much he loved him. 

_ Breathless _ they pull away. 

“I’m still wet,” Sam muttered against Bucky’s neck.

Bucky went to snort in amusement but all that came out was a groan. “We should get you out of those clothes.”

Sam mouthed at Bucky’s neck. “What about the floor?”

“Sure, we can do it on the floor, You know I’m not picky,” Bucky grabbed Sam’s face. It was his turn to enjoy some neck. 

Sam snorted as much as he could as Bucky took his breath away. “Fuck me.”

“Will do,” Bucky smirked. He was going to show Sam how much he needed him. He stopped long enough to look at Sam in his chocolate warm eyes. “I need you, please let me show you how much I need you. You're my everything…”

“If my everything is you,” Sam breathed. 


End file.
